What Do You Want To Be When You Grow Up?
What a great question that can lead to huge personal growth.
I want to share an easy process that you can use to extend this question and create many benefits for your child. It’s a process we use in developing our Black Belts.
We use this process like this:
- In our Karate classes, most students come into the class wanting to be like a Black Belt.
- In class we ask them, “What are some words that describe a Black Belt?” We’ll get many answers; Strong, Kind, They’re Nice, Smart, Patient, They Work Hard, They Keep Getting Better, They Have Courage, They Don’t Give Up, They Help People… and more.
- Then we’ll say, “Close your eyes and imagine you are a Black Belt right now.”
- After a few moments we ask the students, “Is that the kind of person you want to be?” The overwhelming answer is Yes!
- Then we ask for a decision. Can you decide to be like a Black Belt right now? Again we get an overwhelming Yes!
- We finally explain, “We have just planted a seed that will become a Black Belt. If each day we Decide to Be a Black Belt, and Act like a Black Belt, you Will Become that special type of person we call Black Belt”
The Process:
- What do you want to be when you grow up?
- What is that type of person like?
- Imagine that type of person right now and sense how great it feels to be that type of person.
- Make the decision to be that type of person right now.
- Then make a habit by deciding each day to be that type of person.
In Karate we know, that to get any goal in our life, we must become the type of person that will achieve that goal. We must build our internal character to match the goal we want to have.
What do you want to be when you grow up?
Our being-ness; who we are, and who we decide to be, is one of the most powerful forces in our life. And so, learning how to direct that force can help us create the life we want to live.
We could also be asking what do you want to have, what do you want to do, what do you want to get, when you grow up, but for me, the power of who you decide to be is much more powerful than these lower level goals because what you get, have, or do is created by the type of person you are, the person you have decided to be.
What is that type of person like?
Ask your child to imagine that type of person. Ask them, “What is that person like? Ask any questions that can get them to think about the character of this person they want to become. Did they give up on their goals? Did they keep learning things? How do they treat the other people on their team? Are they honest? Are they confident? Are they trying to help other people? Ask any questions that help define the character traits of this type of person they want to become.
You can also ask questions to help them realize character traits the person doesn’t have. “Would a Karate Sensei fall on the ground whining and crying because he has to do something he doesn’t like doing?”
Imagine that type of person right now, and sense how it feels to be that type of person.
Our imagination is a powerful force we can use to direct and improve our life. Help your child to fully imagine that type of person they want to become. Imagine them with all their character traits and how they move, how they talk, how they act, what their life is like. Then have them, in their imagination, pull that person into themselves. You can then ask questions about how it feels to be that kind of person. Do they feel strong, do they feel they have power, do they feel proud of themselves, and similar questions. An important part of this step is to help them to actually feel like they are this type of person with all the good feelings that go with it.
Then Decide to be that person right now.
While your child is imagining being that person, you can ask them for a decision; “Is this the type of person you want to be?” Your child’s decision helps them to build their self-image of the person they are and who they will become. This is much more powerful than them just being told, “This is the type of person you should be.” It’s more powerful because your child is choosing to be that type of person.
Then every day, take time to decide again to be that person.
Because of the way our brains work, we need to repeat decisions over and over until they become a habit. So, over the next 3 weeks, ask them what it would be like to be the person they want to grow up to be. Let them imagine it again, and feel what it would be like. Then you can ask again “Is that the kind of person you want to be.
This process isn’t just for kids.
Of course, it is always OK to change your goal to become an even better version of yourself. For us the prize in life is not so much the goals we achieve or the things we have. The big prize is in becoming the type of person we want to be.
If you think Karate might be something you’d like to try, just email us to set up a Free Class so your child can see if they like it, and so you can see if we might fit with what you are looking for. Email: UKOKarate@wavecable.com
Keep making your life better every day,
Sensei Grout
UKO Karate
360-710-0005
